Russian Chastushki chords by Traditional

Tuning: Standard (e B G D A E)


Dm       Am
Down the river drifts an axe
E        Am
From the town of Byron
Dm       Am
Let it float by itself-
E        Am
Fucking piece of iron!!!


Dm       Am
I was sleeping with my honey
E     Am
Abs?lutely naked,
Dm      Am
I have taken my panties off
E       Am
Just to make a statement.

Dm       Am
Fish in thick tomato sauce
E       Am
Swims in happy comatose
Dm    Am
Only me, pathetic wimp
E        Am
Have no fucking place to swim.


Dm        Am
Starlet?s fallen from the heavens
E       Am
Right into my boyfriend's briefs,
Dm        Am
I don't mind his roasted penis
E       Am
If it helps us live in peace.


Dm          Am
Girls have called me to the party
E     Am
I decided not to come,
Dm        Am
It's because my clothes are ugly
E      Am
And my dick is a tiny one.


Dm        Am
Time has shifted for an hour ?
E      Am
What a mess on globe
Dm      Am
Dick was hard before wakeup,
E      Am
Now it's up at work.


Dm     Am
In a tree a duck got stuck
E      Am
Noble eagle fucked that duck
Dm      Am
You can hear branches crack
E      Am
Sqeaky-dick and fucky-quack!


Dm     Am
Guy Miron shows such a trick:
E        Am
Crow is sitting on his dick
Dm      Am
And as soon as starts to croak -
E      Am
Has he boner on his cock


Dm    Am
Old Ivan Ilyich and I
E      Am
Used to work at a CI
Dm        Am
He?s a fuckhead, so am I
E         Am
Someone?s filched our CI.


Dm      Am
You are fine if you are steadfast
E      Am
In relations with milkmaid.
Dm        Am
You get wholesome milky breakfast
E      Am
And occasionally laid.


Dm        Am
Nick is crossing village slowly ?
E     Am
Outside it is cold and snowy.
Dm       Am
But his dick is up and running
E       Am
Just in case if something?s coming.


Dm        Am
Girls had a fight at country hut
E     Am
Over who got hairiest cunt.
Dm       Am
Well, more hair of the most
E        Am
Had the beaver of the host.


Dm      Am
You were mine the other day,
E        Am
Mike is screwing you today.
Dm      Am
He?s got cock as thick as trees
E         Am
On the Shishkin?s masterpiece.


Dm      Am
Have you seen four dicks together
E      Am
Dancing on a mountain peak?
Dm      Am
And one dick had fucked another
E      Am
But with yet another dick.


Dm      Am
My advice to future bride:
E         Am
Don?t get married, silly!
Dm       Am
Morning comes ? your boobs aside,
E         Am
Snatch is rumpled illy.


Dm       Am
Nick is sitting at the door,
E         Am
Neither dancing, singing nor,
Dm       Am
He is sitting, deaf and dumb,
E       Am
Thinking only "Whom to hump?"


Dm       Am
Coffee pot?s a bit unstable
E      Am
Dishes fall around
Dm      Am
Fucking on a little table
E      Am
Makes a lot of sound


Dm     Am
Two of us ? me and my buddy
E      Am
Giving gifts to everybody
Dm        Am
You get daughter, you get son
E     Am
Patriotic duty?s done


Dm       Am
Wife is telling her old man:
E       Am
"Book me U.S. fare!"
Dm      Am
"Stupid cunt! Don?t think you can ?
E          Am
Trains aren?t going there!"


Dm     Am
I was in a horny mood
E     Am
And I blew Stepan
Dm     Am
He is smart and looking good,
E      Am
Salty on the tongue


Dm       Am
Kids are asking uncle Peck:
E        Am
Why?s there wire on your neck?
Dm      Am
Uncle has no words to spare
E        Am