Carry On Cremating chords by Half Man Half Biscuit

E            A
We?re hardly the fruit from a well-tended banana tree
   E          A
We?re hardly the Bayeux in rock?s rich tapestry
E                 A
We were like two rubber ducks that passed each other in the bath
E               A
I can sound like Wally out of Crossroads, Kath.

D            A
She threw an apple in my eye, cor blimey
D            A
Alex Haley was adopted ? that?s what?s called a disappointment.

E               A
When England won the World Cup back in 1966
E                A
Wembley must have been a sea of smiles
   E                  A
Well I think Kenneth Wolstenholme summed up the moment really well
E                A
When he said ?Just look at Nobby Stiles? yeah.

D            A
She threw an apple in my eye, cor blimey
D            A
Alex Haley was adopted ? that?s what?s called a disappointment.

  E               A
Oh they?re still cremating Hattie Jacques, I am not surprised
E                  A
Come on now, let?s face it, she was fat
  E                A
It usually takes for ever trying to burn the grossly oversized
E                A
Who would ever want to look like that?

D             A
She had a face that could launch a thousand dredgers
D              A
I could never get her on my portable TV.
D            A
She threw an apple in my eye, cor blimey
D            A
Alex Haley was adopted ? that?s what?s called a disappointment.