If That Ain't Country chords by David Allen Coe

Verse 1:
G                            C
The old man was covered with tattoos and scars, he got some in prison and others in bars
  D                      G
The rest he got workin' on old junk cars in the day time
   G
They looked like tombstones in our yard
   C           D        G
And i never seen him when he wasn't tired and mean

Verse 2:
  G                 C
He sold used parts to make ends meet, covered with grease from his head to his feet
D                       G
Cussin' the sweat and the Texas heat, and mus-keeters
    G
And the neighbors said we lived like hicks,
     C          D     G
But they brung their cars for Pa to fix anyhow.

Verse 3:
    G                  C
He was vet'rin proud, tried and true, he'd fight till his heart was black and blue,
D                     G
Didn't know how he'd made it through, the hard times
G
He'd bought our house on the G.I. bill,
    C          D       G
But it wasn't worth all he had to kill to get it

Verse 4:
     G                   C
He drank pearl in a can and Jack Daniels black, chewed tobacco from a mail-pouch sack,
D                     G
Had an old dog that was trained to attack, sometimes
G
He'd get drunk and mean as a rattlesnake,
     C          D           G
And there wasn't too much that he would take, from a stranger

Bridge:
     C       D       G              C
There was 13 kids and a bunch of dogs, house full of chickens and a yard full of hogs,
D          C            G
Spent the summertime cuttin' up logs for the winter
C            D         G              C
Tryin' like the devil to find the lord, and workin' like a n---- for my room and board,
D                                        G
Coal burnin' stove, no natural gas, and if that ain't country, i'll kiss your ass.

Chorus:
G       C    D          G
If that ain't country, it'll hairlip the pope,
G       C    D         G
If that ain't country, it's a damn good joke
       C     D    G      C
I've seen the grand 'ole opry and i met johnny cash,
         D            G
And if that ain't country, i'll kiss your ass.

Instrumental Break:

G C D G

Verse 5:
G                  C
Momma sells eggs at a grocery store, my oldest sister is a first-rate whore,
D                       G
Dad says she can't come home any more, and he means it
G
Ma just sits and keeps her silence
C           D            G
Sister she left 'cause dad got violent, and he knows it

Verse 6:
G                     C
Momma she's old, far beyond her time, from choppin' tobacco and i seen her cryin
   D                       G
When blood started flowin' from her calloused hand, and it hurt me
G
But she'd just keep workin' tryin' to help the old man,
     C         D        G
From the end of one row and back again,like always

Verse 7:
G                             C
She's been through hell since junior went to jail, and when the lights go out she ain't never failed,
  D                     G
To get down on her knees and pray, 'cause she loves him
G
Told all the neighbors he was off in the war,
C             D              G
Fightin' for freedom, he's good to the core, and she's proud

Verse 8:
G                         C
Our place was a graveyard for automobiles, at the end of the porch there was 4 stacks of wheels,
  D                  G
And tires for sale for a dollar or two, cash

Bridge:
     C       D
There was 50 holes in an old tin roof
G          C
Me and my family was livin' proof,
  D
Of people who forgot about poor white trash
                     G
And if that ain't country i'll kiss your ass

Chorus:
G       C    D          G
If that ain't country, it'll hairlip the pope,
G       C    D         G
If that ain't country, it's a damn good joke
       C     D    G      C
I've seen the grand 'ole opry and i met johnny cash,
         D            G
And if that ain't country, i'll kiss your ass.

Outro:
G             C
I'm thinking tonight of my  blue eyes
  D             G
Concerning the great speckled bird
     G            C
I didn't know god made honky-tonk angels
     D            G