Tuning: Standard (E A D G B E) Key: E Difficulty: Novice Verse: E He's been roundin' off bolts since the age of fourteen B7 E Was that a five eighths or a nine sixteenths? E He's got a metric socket that don't quite fit B7 E Well it'll wiggle just a little but it ain't quite stripped A The safety guard's gone from his grinding machine E He got a stiff paint brush he only kinda got clean A He's the hired man, my neighbor and a cousin in law E B7 E He's a jerry riggin' fool, he got the tool for the job
Chorus: A Well it's vise grips for pliers, and pliers for a wrench E A wrench for a hammer, hammers everything else A It just don't seem to make much difference E B7 E I sure do like him but he's hard on equipment Verse: E His corners ain't square and his floor ain't level B7 E And he's always had trouble with the old tape measure E His doors don't close ‘cause the jamb ain't plumb B7 E And he's a Goddamn menace with an air nail gun A They love to see him comin' at the lumberyard store E Fixed the leak in his roof with a two by four A Drilled holes in his boards with the wrong kinda bit E B7 E And when they don't line up he blames the government Chorus: A Well it's vise grips for pliers, and pliers for a wrench E A wrench for a hammer, hammers everything else A It just don't seem to make much difference E B7 E I sure do like him but he's hard on equipment Verse: E He got the whole front yard full of fix ‘em up cars B7 E Three don't run and the rest won't start E Everything's fine with his rebuilt motor B7 E Except of course for the couple spare parts left over A Baler wire tie downs goin' down the road E On two bald tires and an oversize load A He ain't never read a manual ‘cause that's like cheatin' E B7 E He don't mind a little grease on his hands while he's eatin' Chorus: A Well it's vise grips for pliers, and pliers for a wrench E A wrench for a hammer, hammers everything else A It just don't seem to make much difference E B7 E I sure do like him but he's hard on equipment